Gieco 2

GEICO: THE DANGERS OF WIT, AND THE RE-INVENTION OF LONG COPY

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One of the axioms of direct mail when I was young in the business was that long copy worked better than short copy. This was kind of true, but also kind of unexamined. Long copy worked better than short copy due to several factors, most of which don't apply to the world in the 21^st Century:

· Lots of direct mail back in the old days sold publications, and an audience of readers by definition was willing to read, including reading long copy.

· People had more time and were much less media-saturated, up through the early 1980s.

· Post-literacy did not really kick in until the early 1980s.

· Direct mail wasn't really mainstream until 1980 or so, with the exception of magazines, book clubs, travel and entertainment cards, and a few other categories. It was often used as an easy access channel to market non-branded products. Long copy was needed both to tell the story of the unbranded product, and also to create the illusion of substance. (Length = substance, which is why you're impressed by people who read “War and Peace.”)

The world has changed, and so has direct mail. Letters are usually much shorter these days, and it's a bit unusual to find a 4-pager outside of categories such as publications and fundraising (the other GEICO packages I've mentioned all have two-page letters).

And what a winner this letter is!

The first page is wonderfully self-referential, as GEICO pioneers a kind of homey postmodernism: “No one wants to read a long letter about car insurance. So we made this a long letter about saving money” is the caption for a drawing of two drooping eyes on the bottom right of the first page.

Illustrations and captions on all four pages shorten the line length and the text itself, enhancing readability. And each illustration makes a sort of humorous but telling point, in sharp contrast to the wiseacre wit we encountered in the ads and inserts.

Upper left, page two: Illustration is a Pennsylvania driver's license issued to Alexander Graham Bell (who is an organ donor, by the way.) Caption: “Everyone thinks Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone. Actually, he invented a better way to buy car insurance. One call to GEICO could save you hundreds of dollars.”

Bottom, page two, extending into page three: 7 people are portrayed, the 7^th looking at a fellow the right half of whose body has been replaced by a dotted outline. In a cartoon balloon, he says, “Hey, where's the rest of me?” The caption, like the caption on the first page, is endearingly self-referential: “By the time you finish this letter, 7.5 people will switch to GEICO, or more than 10,000 every week. (Read slower and it rounds out to an even 8.)”

I'm usually dead set against any kind of teaser approach these days – people are just too busy to bother. But this works quite nicely, the half man image pretty much driving you to the caption.

Upper right, page 3: Illustration contrasts a huge Lincoln stretch limo with what appears to be a toy Volkswagen beetle (the original, not the new one). Caption: “If your car payment already feels like this…”(underneath the Lincoln) “…wouldn't it be great if your car insurance premium felt like this?” (underneath the Volkswagen).

Page four, left side: A color bar contains three testimonials, and is anchored by a picture of a telephone receiver (the old fashioned, corded kind!), with the caption: “Call us anytime – before breakfast, after dinner or in-between snacks.”

Large type (12 point), short paragraphs, and conversational copy make the letter a pleasure to read.

There's one discordant note, though. An important one…

I COULDN'T GET THROUGH ON THE PHONE!

That's right. GEICO promises seamless, 7/24 telephone service, but the inquiry process was anything but. In repeated attempts, I was never able to get through to a GEICO rep in less than 4 minutes.

The sad thing is, I wasn't calling just for the purposes of this article. I actually wanted to buy some car insurance from GEICO. But I got frustrated, and didn't.

Are they the victim of their own lead-generating success? Perhaps. The more I called, I must say, the more irritated I got at the cross-sell and up-sell pitches GEICO throws at you when you're on hold. I'm sure the pitches sell product, but I doubt whether GEICO knows how many prospective customers abandon the call out of frustration, the more-or-less subliminal feeling being “They can't even put me in touch with a rep, and they're already trying to sell me more stuff.” Better to have music (when in doubt always revert to Vivaldi flute concerti in C major), or perhaps music interspersed with interesting factoids (e.g., relating to cars, driving, transportation in general, etc.).

BRIEF COMMENTS ABOUT OTHER GEICO DM PACKAGES…

· One GEICO direct mail package actually does start out with a light-touch teaser, rather than a core benefit. It's the one whose outer envelope says “The top reasons to shop for car insurance if…

Nine reasons are given, starting from the bottom, David Letterman style. The reasons are meant to be amusing, but come across as sort of forced and unfunny: “9. Your insurer will send an adjuster to appraise your damage, or you get a free, glow-in-the-dark frisbee…8. You have to sell your car to afford the insurance…3. Claim service is available, but only on odd numbered Thursdays when there's a full moon in Tahiti…”

“And (drum-roll, please). The number one reason to shop for car insurance is…”

You're then supposed to turn over the envelope, and pull the tab, which tells you “1. TO SAVE MONEY! In as little as 15 minutes, GEICO could save you 15% or more on your car insurance. Put us to the test…check out our great rates! Call 1-800-515-8247 now for a FREE, no-obligation rate quote. (There's more inside)…”

The tab is wonderful. There's tactile involvement, and you get the whole story – you don't have to continue into the package in order to respond.

The extended, unfunny teaser approach, though, is painful. As I observed earlier, teaser approaches don't work well these days, particularly in mass-market, low-involvement categories.

· Two packages are depersonalized, addressed to “SENSIBLE DRIVER AT” followed by the address. GEICO has been doing this for years. It's the Information Age, and everyone (supposedly) is an adept database marketer, but the fact remains that once you move outside your own customers, mailing lists are undependable animals. There's simply too much volatility for any mass compiled list to be entirely accurate. GEICO has evidently proven to themselves that at least in certain places at certain times, they do well with “SENSIBLE DRIVER” substituting for the name. People tend to trash mail that's addressed to a previous resident, after all, but may well read a piece that subtly flatters them as “SENSIBLE.”

The scale is 1 to 10. 1 = dreadful, 10 = terrific.

1) Copy: 5 (most of the direct mail is great, but not the ads/inserts)

2) Design: 10

3) Topography: 9

4) Scanability: 9

5) Offer/Call-to-Action: 10

6) Clarity: 9

7) Logic: 10

8) Involvement: 9

9) Honesty/Integrity/Believability: 10

10) Attention to Detail: 5 (more phone lines needed!)

Net Index: 8.6